Meeting My Home Stay Family

I just got back from visiting my HCMC home stay family. I took a cab to their apartment myself to meet them at 6 pm, which was not too bad at all. The ten minute cab ride cost less than one dollar! Comparing this to my experience in DC this summer is pretty crazy. The cab driver dropped me off along this street that looked simply like storefronts and markets. I was really confused and a bit concerned that he had not taken me to their apartment. Being used to actual apartment buildings, this seemed completely foreign. He kept knodding his head that yes indeed this was the correct address as he pointed to an alley. Vietnamese alleys are like New York alleys but a little more intense. Think dark, narrow, dilapidated, please. I proceed down this alley, very confused but kind of amused actually. I figured out that this alley is lined with gates to apartments that all open into this alley. I had to ask two people before I found someone who spoke English, but I eventually found the gate number that matched the address my home stay mom gave me. The gate was dark and looked uninhabited, so I was even more confused at this point. Luckily I have a cell phone here, and it started to vibrate in my pocket. I was so relieved to hear Ms. Dung (pronounced "Zoom") on the other line. She kept asking and repeating, "Are you coming? Are you coming?" And I kept answering, "Yes, I think I am here, but there are no lights on…maybe I was driven to the wrong location?" She kept answering that with, "Are you coming? Are you coming?" Oh, language barriers. Some friends and I were talking today about how it is really becoming a challenge here, much more than we expected. Eventually I heard her real voice and realized that this was in fact the correct apartment. (It turns out the cab driver took me to the back of the apartment). I took my shoes off at the entrance as is appropriate here and placed my feet into a pair of house flip flops. Ms. Dung and her two daughters greeted me. The two girls are literally the cutest girls EVER! One is 17 and goes to an international high school and will be going to university next year in Australia. She is clearly absolute dynamite and her English is fantastic. The other girl is 12 and so cute too. They both have choppy, stylish haircuts and have white rimmed, square glasses and wear lots of pink jewelry. They are like little Asian dolls, really! Both the girls and their mother speak great English, so I am really lucky. The actual apartment is extremely modest, very minimal, but clean and nice. There is a living room with one couch and the family moped (located centrally in the room where a fireplace would be in America…figures!), a kitchen with a small table (the size of an American coffee table), little plastic stools, one gas stove top, a mini fridge, and a washing machine.

I actually have the nicest room in the house, which is completely unnecessary and makes me feel a little uncomfortable! I am on the third floor with my own bathroom, shower (no hot water, which is fine given the heat), and a desk in my room as well. When we walked in to the room, two cockroaches scurried to the center of the room and the girls and the mother just smiled (smiling in Vietnam is definitely not the same as in America…I have come to learn that it means "I am really uncomfortable right now." For example, when our boat broke down in the middle of the river, every Vietnamese person on board started to smile). Anyway, I really am fortunate with the living conditions, especially compared to many others in my group. Although my commute to school may be a little long and I have to do it myself unlike many others who have host sisters who also attend the University, it is nice to have my own room and bathroom.

Back to the meal, it was interesting to note the gender roles at play. When the father came home in the middle of our meal (which was beef pho, which entails rice noodles, beef broth, herbs, fresh basil, chili sauce, onions, and two small pieces of beef), he almost stand-offishly introduced himself to me and then began eating his meal, calling on his daughter to bring him water and a fresh piece of lime. He was not unfriendly by any means, but he was not smiley or overly eager to speak with me either. We had two bowls of pho for dinner, which was only because I was the "honored guest," as Ms. Dung called me. No wonder everyone is so thin here- it is impossible not to lose weight given what people eat here. Everything is in smaller portions, and you are naturally more conscious of every bite you put into your mouth, especially because you generally eat family style and use chopsticks to pick from the center of the table each bite. It was clear that my family is fairly well off given that their kids are going abroad to study, yet by American standards they would be very poor. For example, because I was the guest, we had fruit for dessert, which entails splitting one grapefruit amongst six people (a cousin came for dessert). We shared two tea bags among four people. Small things like this were so evident to me. They are the sweetest people though, and I am looking forward to it despite being a bit anxious about it - I know it will be very challenging though. Everyone else in my group is really nervous about their home stays as well.

I rode a moped tonight for the first time! Ms. Dung took me home after our long after dinner conversation at the dinner table. It was pretty scary at first, but actually fun! They were giggling at me as I put on my helmet and got onto the moped for the first time, which was so cute too. I still can't get over the absence of traffic laws for these mopeds! We literally just wove in and out of traffic, but somehow it works. She kept telling me that she is a great driver and not to worry. She also showed me the University from their apartment, which is a twenty minute walk, but hopefully she isn't expecting me to remember the route, because it was definitely at least ten different turns on confusing Vietnamese named streets that make no sense! I am really excited about the whole experience, though, and I will post more later! Must go to sleep. Miss you all!